sucky haiku of the day
O’Reilly psycho nutjob
the sky is falling
OK. So this haiku doesn’t make sense. But it contains a 5 a 7 and a 5 I’ve been wanting to fit into a haiku. If you think about this one really hard, it kind of makes sense. Though I find Dan Rather is more of a “sky is falling” kind of guy. O’Reilly is a “what sky? you mean the liberal sky?” kind of guy. But that’s a whole different thing.
Anyway, please enjoy the kind of make-it-what-you-will-haiku. It’s like Mad Libs, only with meaning instead of of adjectives. A Meaning Lib, if you will. (Or, Mad Meaning?)
There’s nothing cuter than watching video of your son and a goat at a strawberry farm, except watching your son watch the video of himself and a goat at the strawberry farm. That is until your son loses interest in the video and tries to staple your back with a stapler you accidentally left within his reach. Then nothing is cute anymore and you get mad.
what was I just saying?
Not five minutes ago I decided to concentrate on getting the novel rejected more. And 4 1/2 minutes ago I got an email from an agent saying that my story didn’t “speak to him.”
Well, done, Self. Well done.
there’s a gecko on the window
little green lizard
where is your scary forked tongue?
you reptile poseur
Is it poser or poseur? Am I a pose(u)r for not knowing how to spell it? Is this the most interesting thing I have to talk about today? Unfortunately yes.
I’m bummed and feeling uncreative. I got another rejection from an agent, but that’s not what has me bummed. Someone unsubscibed from the haiku of the day email today. I guess it’s against the rules to email them back and ask why. I’m sure it had nothing to do with irritating haiku emails arriving in his/her inbox everyday. But after almost four years of sending out the haiku of the day I’ve never had anyone unsubscibe. It’s like a world record or something. And I know it’s dumb to take an unsubscribe personally. If Dell did that, there would be a whole department of depressed people keening over the rampant unsubscription rate of the Small Business emails.
S’OK, though. I’m going to concentrate on getting the novel rejected more. That will deaden the blow of rejected haiku, which, for me, is somehow worse.
Speaking of unrejected haiku, though, got another one in the austinmama newsletter:
that’s one big pimple
when baby points to Mom’s chin
says, “Mommy nipple.”
I’m good enough. I’m smart enough. And doggone it, people like nipple haikus.
Fair and Balanced Hypocrites
fascist fox pundits
they watch temptation island?
the News Corp. janus
Leveraging the buzzword paradigm
saying “out of the box” is so in the box.
A lot of blogs have wish lists on them. I wonder if anyone ever buys anything and sends it to the blogger. I guess, if you love a blog a lot, wake up every morning and read it, eventually you might want to thank that person for entertaining you. Is that the reasoning behind posting a wish list? I’m all for free gifts from strangers (sort of), but I feel funny about the wish list. Of course, I used to feel funny about writing on mundane topics like this, and look how that’s turned out…
Anyway, for now I’m keeping the wish list off. You can pay me by posting irreverent and overly-praising (praiseful?) comments.
Unless someone wants to buy me a new mouse. This psycho nutjob mouse IS OUT OF CONTROL.