just a sample

no wonder I trip
and fall on my ass a lot
there’s shit everywhere

I’m very busy. All week I’ve been working on editing the You Know, For Kids! novel that I’m trying to get published, and I’ve been doing a lot of freelance writing (more freelance thinking than writing, really, but that’s how it works).

Anyway, my house is reaping the consequences. Currently, on the floor in the kitchen:

a ripped Entertainment Weekly
a ripped drawing by the wee one
a hot pink feather
a partial Jimmy Neutron thing from a Wendy’s kid’s meal
several Buzz Lightyear napkins
a penny
a wooden dollhouse chair
Newman
most of Newman’s hair

On the living room floor:
many, many more Buzz Lightyear napkins (the wee one covered the entire sofa at one point)
a spyglass
a hair pick
a circle e candles hat
darth vader
a flaccid Bert puppet
a facedown Zoe puppet
Buzz Lightyear himself (in several plastic and non incarnations)
a star wars picture book
a Maisy book
the TV remote
the DVD player remote
the TiVo remote
an elephant nose
all the pieces to Don’t Break the Ice (and not in one nice pile)
an empty shoebox
a toy John Deere wrench
a newspaper
myriad green toy soldiers

That’s just the stuff I can see from the kitchen table.

Oh, and did I mention we have relatives coming to visit this weekend? Oh, is that right? this weekend starts right now? Oh, am I not finished with any of my editing or freelance writing? Oh, am I wasting time blogging? Oh, will the wee one watch Toy Story 80 frillion times today? Is that right?

Starting today I’m taking donations for a maid. And part-time pre-school. And a vacuum cleaner that effing works for a change. And an ear transplant for Newman. And a half-way decent haircut. And a house with a playroom.

I’m off now, to fall on my ass on so many different levels….

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