must swallow a pill
that is same size as baby
how do mules do it?

I am such a baby. A whiny baby. Why? because I have to take medicine. I HATE taking medicine. I hate how it makes me feel. I hate that it has side effects that could kill me. I especially hate having to choke down ginormous pills twice a day.

When I was a kid I could never swallow pills. I was taking liquid Amoxicillan until I was in college. And when liquid wasn’t available, my mom would open up the capsules and mix up the powder in applesauce. Talk about nasty. (Just a note: she wasn’t doing that for me in college. I did it myself then.)

As I got older and had a baby I learned that swallowing big pills had benefits – like narcotic type benefits that are really swell after you’ve spent 18 hours pushing a nearly nine pound baby out of a not so large orifice.

So, suddenly, I could swallow pills. It was like a miracle. I still didn’t like taking meds, but it was easier without the gagging and retching and all that.

THEN, THEN, I found the best general practitioner in the whole wide world who, instead of making me swallow pills, just gave me a shot in the ass every time I was sick. What wonder that was! I didn’t like getting a shot, but 2 minutes of pain vs. a week of choking down horse pills – hallelujah.

But now that I’m pregnant, I guess the shots are out. Or they don’t have a shot in the kind of medicine I have to take. Stupid antibiotics for a stupid infection. So I have to take these HUGE pills twice a day. And sometimes I can get them down and sometimes not. So I had to sheepishly ask my doctor if I could also have a liquid prescription as a back-up. Now I have a choice: gag on gallons of foul pediatric liquid, or gag on horse pills. It is not a choice I like.

Also, this medicine apparently has the "rare side effect" of sometimes killing people with intestinal problems WEEKS AFTER taking it. I even read a CNN story about how the problems this antibiotic causes are becoming resistant to other medications and people – namely PREGNANT WOMEN – are dying more often. Excellent.

Reading this makes me want to chuck all the meds into the toilet. But then again, if the infection gets worse it could cause preterm labor and 16 weeks is way too early to have a baby.

This, I guess, is what they call "weighing risks and benefits." Well, it sucks. And this medicine sucks. And I hate it. And wah.

One thought on “

  1. If it makes you feel better, I only managed to start taking pills when I was about 22 or 23. And can I take them like a normal person now? Nope. 2 or 3 years of time to practice and I still shove them down my throat with a finger- tiny ones, horse pills, any and all.
    The only good thing is I can dry-swallow them if need be because I don’t actually have to swallow the darned things…


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