Where’s my damn rocket pack?

soundproof children’s tank
and more computers than books
a new library

The tinys and I took a trip to our brand spankin’ new community library yesterday and y’all… it is swank. There are only about four books in the whole thing, but it’s swank anyway. Of course, I could do with a little less fancy and a lot more books, but it was still fun to walk around.

You have to understand, though, that when I’m talking about fancy I mean it’s upgraded from the 20×15 trailer that used to be the library. So, pretty much, having four walls that can withstand a stiff breeze is high falutin’. That and we have four books now instead of two.

Anyway, the kids’ area is completely surrounded in glass and has its own family bathroom. It also has a glass room inside the glass room for story time. This is a library all about silence, I think. Or else they’re planning for some kind of Bruce Willis movie to be filmed there where multiple people get thrown through multiple plate glass windows. Hollywood movie scouts, take note!

Also fancy? The self-checkout. Yes, yes, I realize I haven’t been a proponent of self-checkouts in the past, and I still don’t much like them, but this one? Almost idiot-proof. Really! You scan your card, then you eye the weird pad on the checkout counter. You put your books on the pad. Then the computer somehow magically and creepily knows which books you have even if they are stacked on top of each other. You punch in your pin #, the computer spits out a receipt with all of your books listed and the dates they’re due and voila. I still don’t know if I like it or not (sue me for being old-school. I like to banter with the librarians about the books I’m checking out and the weather and how big the kids are getting) but it’s efficient. Or it was yesterday when we were the only people there.

In conclusion, new pre-destroyed-by-Bruce-Willis library? Cool. Self-checkout? Cool (but not wholly approved of).

We truly live in the age of the Jetsons, don’t we?

bizarro baby!

sleeps soundly in crib
who is this little baby?
she looks familiar

The wee-er one is alseep in her crib! For the first time ever! No swing, no Rob Zombie, nothing. I just put her in her crib, walked away to answer the phone, came back and whuh? Asleep! For thirty minutes now! I cannot use enough exclamation points!


Let the visiting begin

we come to your house
tornadoes of feet, hands, noise
yet you want us back

In about a week, the wee one, the wee-er one and I begin our trek out east (daddy has to stay home and work). It’s a trek I’m looking forward to and dreading all at the same conflicted time. Hopefully, I’m making it much worse in my head than it will really be, because we have a direct flight that’s only about 2 1/2 hours. The wee one can watch a movie, the wee-er one can nurse and sleep and I can spend the flight remembering how the car seats get buckled into a different car.

Then we will be there – extra arms, hands, smiles, grandparents, cousins, everything. It should be a whole lot of exhausting fun. Plus it will be cold, and that will be nice and Christmas-y.

Before we take our "really, really, it won’t be that bad" flight we’re going to spend a few days at my sister’s house; my sister’s child-free home that smells not of peanut butter and spit up, but of aromatherapy candles and open bowls of m&ms. Her house where magazines actually last long enough to end up in stacks instead of ripped up, drooled on shreds that are found weeks later wadded up under the  sofa cushions. Her house where the pantry is like Costco, full of quasi-healthy non-beige things to eat like organic fruit leather, instead of Gerber chicken sticks (which the wee one will eat until he’s an old man), and stale animal crackers.

Ah, the house of the DINK. It’s a fun place to visit. We roar into it like a gaggle (pride?  herd? murder? yeah, murder) of tasmanian devils. And when we leave there are decapitated figurines, extra holes in the wall, an empty pantry, and a bathroom that has distinctly lost its soothing candle smell. And yet we’re invited back, so we happily go.  Mama gets a break, sister and her husband get a nice dose of birth control, and everyone is fulfilled.

I look forward to drinking cold bottled water, eating some fruit leather and reading an O Magazine with all of the pages intact. After that the murder of haikuofthedays will hit the airport and we’ll be off to the grandparents to get our various freaks on.

Until then, I have a week of packing and Christmas shopping that I’m looking forward to very much (only because I’ve decided to pack very lightly and do all of my shopping online. Yay for the google and interweb).

Oop. I just got mooned and my milk let down so among other more disturbing things, I think that means I have to get off the computer now.