“Don’t let him jump on me, I have a penis infection!”

vacation begins
bathing suit spots taking hits
let fun begin, too?

After a truly crazy busy week, the kiddos and I have finally arrived in Atlanta, mostly unscathed from our travels. Even after an unsettling few days where various doctors tried to suss out which gasket I blew from coughing my brains out, I think things are calming down.

Just FYI, coughing fits can apparently cause you to blow out an ovarian cyst and/or pull a muscle. We still haven’t figured out if I did both or not, but I can tell you that regardless, stabbing pains in one’s left side are no fun. I suggest avoiding violent coughing fits as much as possible.

Also, FYI, when your soon to be five-year-old gets some kind of scratch on his penis and requires some triple antibiotic ointment, don’t make a big deal about "preventing infection" because the only thing he’ll hear is "infection" and then he’ll insist on telling everyone he meets that he has a penis infection. It will also be the first thing he shouts as he arrives at your sister’s house and her dogs runs toward him.

"Don’t let him jump on me, I have a penis infection!"

We’re going to make up some t-shirts, I think.

Anyway, despite our TMI troubles, we’re here in hotlanta, enjoying the smoke-filled air and the never-ending supply of Hershey’s kisses, Cokes and grandparents. Huzzah!

Now, if only I could get the wee-er one to sleep and the wee one to stop talking about penis infections, we might actually be able to visit some of out relations. Or, you know, go out in public.

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