lots of legs, some fur
extra eyes and even wings
not the pets you want
I’ve been resisting pest control for a while now. My husband wants to sign a contract for regular, quarterly death raids on our unwelcome critters, and I’ve been holding out. I’m not a fan of poison, really, especially with kids and a puppy.
But oh, how the times they are a changin’.
Strike number one for my environmental/anti-poison crusade: scorpion on the stairs
Strike number two: roach skittering across the floor
Strike number three: tarantula on the wee one’s slide in the backyard
Seriously. Tarantulas and scorpions? Not cool. I mean, what the hell? Do we live in the Wild West? No. Is this a horror movie? No. Are we in an episode of Planet Earth: Heebie Jeebies? No. We just happen to live in a new neighborhood, across the street from a pond. That pesky pond.
Oh, and I didn’t even mention the stealthy fire ants that attacked the wee one’s feet the other day. And the wasps on the front porch. And the cricket the wee-er one almost ate. I mean, come on. If the creepy crawlies are going to lay siege to my house, then I’m going to be forced to fight back.
Hear that scorpions, tarantulas, ants, roaches and other sundry disgusting critters? I’m coming after ALL your asses. Well, I’m going to hire a dude to come after you, but whatever. SOMEONE’S coming after you, so clear out, before it’s too late.
Shock and awe, baby. Shock and awe.