holiday frenzy
the gifts are bought, presents wrapped
now it’s time to clean

We’re all running around like crazy today, trying to clean up the pig sty house in anticipation of our guests. Things were really out of hand around here and so now my husband and I are frantically trying to remove carpet stains and handprints off the wall and things like that, in addition to the regular cleaning.

My husband would never admit this, but I will: we’re feeling a little compensatory after the Christmas Debacle of Aught Six. So we’re working hard to make this Christmas extra special nice (even though none of the victims of Aught Six will be here, nor will they probably ever come back).

The cleaning commences. Threats of calling Santa and canceling Christmas are thrown about in an unmeasured fashion. The wee one is cowering in the game room, picking up drifts of small plastic toys that are at least knee high. The wee-er one tosses laundry on the floor as quickly as I can fold it. We are a merry lot.

And also, in the vein of our most favorite Christmas movie ever – a Christmas Story – I unleashed a powerful string of profanities this morning that hovers over our house, still. The wee one, in an attempt to see if his toast was ready, hopped onto the counter and spilled an entire travel mug of coffee onto a present I bought for a friend; a present I am beside myself over because it’s so incredibly fantastic. Now it is incredibly, fantastically stained brown and infused with the scent of french roast and chicory. As I stated so plainly this morning: AHHHHHHH GODDAMMIT FUCK NOOOOOO!

Sigh.

The cleaning continues… and I’m wrapping that present anyway. Things that smell like coffee are nice. Right?