Late to the Party

th-that don’t kill me
can only make me stronger
Kanye may be right

Being the old fogey that I am, I was unaware you can buy a "personal massager" (we are in Texas after all) that plugs into your iPod and gets jiggy with the beat from whatever music you get down to, so to speak.

In fact, there are apparently a bunch of "personal massagers" that do this, including one that creates vibrations not just from your iPod, but from whatever noise it picks up in the room. Hmmm. Suddenly the neighbor’s barking dog becomes even more of a nuisance. Or not. I make no judgments.

Anyway, I learned this by watching a show called Erotic Shop. It’s an infomercial/QVC knockoff that plays in the wee morning hours on the Oxygen network. I admit to not watching the whole show. I began to get lightheaded at one point.

You guys, that stuff is crazy. And, also? You can buy them via Amazon in case you have a little extra money left on that holiday gift certificate.

See what never sleeping does? You hear about magical new inventions. And also the phrase "bubble plug."

I’m pretty sure in Texas you can get arrested for just saying that.

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