In case you were wondering, when you have to feed your baby milk augmented by thickening slime, the thickening slime also augments other things.
I could probably sell his thickened poo as a) an alternative to Chinese-made drywall b) pothole filler c) material to stuff inside those bouncy floors that gymnasts use.
Also, I might need some dynamite up in here. This shit does not come off the changing table. It is worse than dried up grits. And if you don't know how hard it is to clean dried up grits off of things (namely floors, highchairs, eyeglasses) you do not embrace your Southern heritage.
When your baby's poop resembles a high dollar clay facial mask you know things are just.not.ordinary in your house.
It smells really bad, too. In case you were wondering. Probably the gymnasts won't like that.