I've been trying to write this post for hours. Struggling to figure out a haiku… struggling to find the right words… I haven't actually figured out what to say, but if I don't start writing something I will just keep staring at the white screen and that's no good.
The auction last night was amazing. So many people, so many amazing things to bid on, so much to process.
It's unreal, this community support we have. Our family has grown by infinity over the past year.
I don't know when we'll take our first trip to Cincinnati. I am desperate for it to be soon. But I read blogs about other kiddos who have had laryngotracheoplasties, or cricotracheal resections and I start to kind of hyperventilate. Wait. Was that just in poor taste what I said? I am tacky even when I'm verklempt!
Anyway, I read about the process, and it is kind of terrifying. We don't even know for 100% sure Dr. Cotton will take Ike-a-saurus' case, so I'm getting a little ahead of myself with the panic talk, but I want to be prepared.
The LTP is some scary shit. It may be a year away for us. Maybe months. Maybe not ever. We don't know. It will take at least one trip up for tests and consultations to find out. And that's IF Dr. Cotton takes us on. (If he doesn't, or can't, one of his colleagues will.)
I used to think it was nerve-wracking waiting for boys to call me. I would test out the phone by picking it up, listening for the dial tone, and being all, "yep, phone still works. Maybe HIS phone is broken!"
I feel the same way now, about waiting to hear from Dr. Cotton's nurse.
But I know when she calls, whatever she has to say, we have a zillion people who have our collective family back. A zillion thoughts and prayers and wishes for Ike. A zillion worried expressions. A zillion gasps of terror. A zillion sighs of relief.
And now we have a zillion dollars to help with everything. Well, maybe not a zillion, but it feels like it.
For that, I can't thank you all enough. We are tremendously, infinitely, immeasurably, grateful.