Cloaking device: activate!

hey, did you see that?
no response, only silence
just keep on walking

Most days when I drive I'm pretty sure I have accidentally engaged the cloaking device on my car. Every other piece of motorized or person-powered equipment on the road seems to barrel down the street right towards me, not noticing at all that I am sitting in my car at the red light, or at the stop sign, or in a parking place or making an illegal left turn.

Today, I somehow engaged the invisibility cloak on myself. Normally, this wouldn't be a bad thing. In fact, I spend a lot of time wishing I could be invisible. I like the idea of slipping in and out of somewhere, grabbing what I need and not having to talk to anyone. Sometimes, though, when I go somewhere and I'm likely to know people, I try to be polite and say hello.

I must be fully cloaked today, because all of my hellos went unnoticed. I offered a hello to several people at varying times of the day and it was totally like a movie where the nerdy kid sees the cute kid waving at her, but it turns out he's waving to the person behind her. Except for opposite of that.

I guess this is better than being purposely snubbed, but still. I don't often actually WANT to talk to people, so on the days when I'm ready to say hello it does no good to my self-esteem for my waves to be misplaced.

Really, though, if the choice is to be unnoticed or ignored, I'll choose unnoticed. Maybe my cloaking device was telling me that my breath was stinky. Maybe it was protecting me from emotional harm. I can dig it.

If only I could be inivisible at home sometimes. Then maybe I could go to the bathroom in peace. Must learn to control the cloaking device. That's a good goal to have, isn't it? Everyone else can work on their retirement funds and fulfilling lifelong dreams – I'm going to work on learning how to pop in and out of people's consciousness at will. Fun!

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One thought on “Cloaking device: activate!

  1. Seriously. Some days I feel like I am the Grand Marshal at my own parade. The entire family INCLUDING THE DAWG follows me around the house. If they aren’t following me, they are calling to me from another room.
    I would lock the door when i take a shower only I can’t stand the sound of the scraping and clawing from the family on the other side trying to get into the bathroom to ask me if I have seen their (include random item here).
    Enjoy invisiblity! If you figure out how to make it work at home, let me know!

    Like

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